Thanksgiving is our first big holiday without him.
Texas & TCU are playing.
TCU is winning.
I have mixed feelings about that.
I want Austin to know I had a lot of great memories in Texas. I want to take him to the places I loved most in Dallas & Fort Worth. I want to show him the house he came home to & seminary where he & I spent so much time swimming in the indoor pool. I want to show him the school where ladies loved on him when he was a tiny baby.
Sometimes I find myself baffled at how things have played out. The most frustrating part is that there is no explanation. He didn't want what he promised in marriage. He just left us & moved out with me pregnant trying to potty train Austin. It's just really terrible.
Now Austin & I are trying to work through all of this. It's grief. It's sadness. Its anger. & frustration. Its trying to teach Austin what's right when a lot of things that we have experienced aren't right. It's trying to create a new exciting normal.
Khloe. Sweet Khloe. She loves my dad. "G-Da" She loves my mom. She loves her brother. She is doing well at school. She is ours & we are so thankful God gave us Khloe in the midst of all the ugly.
Today is Thanksgiving.
It was a good day.
We ate a lot. We rested. Desserts were yummy. Attitudes were good.
Thankful for my two children, my family, & good memories.